Okay… so I’m sure that somewhere in the library of congress there is a book titled “things to do in Madison Wisconsin”, I’m also pretty sure that it doesn’t include any of the following.
-eat one’s own bodyweight in fried cheese
-locate favorite bar from your last visit. The one where all you can remember about it is that they serve long island iced teas in quart canning jars.
-Once said bar has been located proceed to make the bar tender feel useful by ordering a whole bunch of the aforementioned cocktail, since you are the only people in there at 5pm.
-scare off a lonely cardiologist
-pay some lucky college student to drive your car home for you (see picture)
-take a two mile walk to find some dinner that ends up across the street from where you started in the first place
-eat more fried cheese.
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